Commentary—

Let Us Be Grateful For 17

By Lorraine A. Hurley

Yes, thanksgiving will never be the same after 2008. Imagine, 17 family members will be here to join each other on the most family-celebrated holiday of all. The joy, the challenge, the love, and the laughs will be here in my home. How did all of this occur? Very easily.

Since my three daughters left home for college and then onto married life, it was an almost unspoken but understood situation that they would travel “home” for Thanksgiving. So, that first year when it began, there were only six — three daughters, my husband, my mother, who really started the tradition way back in Pennsylvania, and myself. It was a simple but fun way to be together, to share stories, to enjoy my home-cooked meal, to begin holiday shopping, and have a family reunite as a family.

Then over the years, other joined — husbands, babies, cousins, and pets. But still, they all came. Laughter was always prominent when my husband proceeded to carve the turkey — he still hasn’t mastered the technique, but nobody cares. His sense of humor vibrates and is being passed down to the youngest.

Who would ever believe that in 2008, our lives would change so much since that first Thanksgiving that my husband and I spent alone? We were married on November 6 and if our crystal ball could  predict the family we would have 37 years later, perhaps I would not have cried so much on our first Turkey Day together. Why did I cry? I didn’t know how to cook and a snowstorm stopped us from being with my parents in Pennsylvania. So we ate in a restaurant that had no turkey due to the weather and volume of travelers. We got there too late, but never again.

The years brought us children, who needed to eat and I learned to cook! I was a natural in the kitchen, never realizing that I had my Mother’s talent, who was a chef in a restaurant for 19 years.

The subsequent Thanksgiving dinners became a time of total family togetherness. When my Marine veteran husband and I bow our heads for the prayer before meals, we will glance at our family, the oldest daughter, her husband and three children from New York State, our second daughter with her Army husband and their three children from Texas, our youngest daughter and her husband from New York City, our niece and nephew from Massachusetts, and our Army nurse from Maryland. We will be ever so grateful, ever so grateful indeed.

Then there were the November tears, when the Army members — my daughter in Afghanistan, my son-in-law in Iraq, my other son-in-law in Kosova, the Army nurse daughter working long hours in an Army hospital, and an Army nurse niece flying to Germany with the soldiers wounded in war — were absent at the Thanksgiving table. The wishbone took on a new meaning — we wished and prayed and they returned!

The annual Thanksgiving dinner became a “seating decision” adventure as babies came along. Every child, by now there are six, wanted to sit next to each other. Aunt Maura made creative placemats. No questions asked. The grandchildren’s ages are 8, 7, 5, two 3’s, and 11 months. Two cousins are 10 and 15. We have them all seated appropriately with no shifting about.

The 11-month-old will be experiencing her first Thanksgiving and she will have the place of honor — next to my husband and the turkey. Which turkey? This year we will have two, almost double of everything.

What will a grandmother serve at a Thanksgiving dinner? The 37th one with 17 guests? So here it is: A feast for my family, a feast for my veterans, a feast for my children, a feast for my grandchildren, a feast for all!

(Lorraine A. Hurley serves Thanksgiving dinners at her home on South Main Street)