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Date: Fri 05-Mar-1999

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Date: Fri 05-Mar-1999

Publication: Bee

Author: SHANNO

Quick Words:

brides-expenses-costs

Full Text:

BRIDES: Who Traditionally Foots The Bill

Often the groom and his family will offer to share some of the expenses of the

wedding which have been traditionally carried by the bride's family. The

question should not be raised by the bride's family, however; the groom's

family must volunteer to share expenses.

Today, many brides and grooms are picking up the cost of the wedding

themselves. What follows is the traditional breakdown of costs:

The Bride's Costs

Engraved invitations and announcements

The bridal outfit

Bridal photographs

Bridal consultant

The bride's trousseau

Cost of the bride's premarital blood test for license

The bride's "maiden dinner"

Cost of the reception

Flowers for the church and the reception

Gratuities for off-duty policemen or others asked to direct traffic

Corsages for the bride's mother and grandmothers

Flowers for the bride and her attendants, her father's bouttoniere

Bridesmaids' party

Gifts for the bride's attendants

The groom's wedding ring

Music at the church and reception

Sexton and organist fee, choir fee

Carpets, ribbons, awnings, tents

Fee for the church rental

A limousine for the bride and other cars for transportation

A wedding gift or a honeymoon trip

Hotel bills for out-of-town attendants if they cannot be accommodated by the

bride's family, friends or relatives

Transportation for the bridal party from ceremony to reception

The Groom's Costs

The wedding ring

The marriage license and cost of his premarital blood test

The bride's flowers (the bridal bouquet if she wears a bridal gown, or a

corsage), and the going-away corsage

His own, the ushers' boutonnieres and that of his father

Corsage for his mother and grandmothers

Gifts for the ushers

A wedding gift for the bride

His bachelor dinner

The rehearsal dinner

The entire cost of the wedding trip (unless this is a gift from the parents)

His own wedding and wedding trip clothes

The home into which the new couple will move and major furnishings

Hotel bills for his best man and ushers if they cannot be accommodated by his

friends, family or relatives

Of course, the family of either the bride or the groom will in many cases pick

up a number of these costs. Traditionally his family will pay for the

rehearsal dinner, for instance, and hers will foot the bill for the ceremony

and reception. In this case, as a rule, the groom's family should defer to the

bride's family for the wedding ceremony and reception, and the bride's family

should defer to the groom's family for the rehearsal dinner.

Remember, if there is a disagreement concerning anything about the rehearsal

dinner, the groom's family does have final say because they are the ones

paying for it. The same holds true for the bride's family with their financial

responsibilities.

Of course, the wedding events should be used to blend the two families, not

drive them apart.

-Primary Source: Amy Vanderbilt's Book of Etiquette

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