The following is The Ducklaration of Independence, as read by guest speaker John Hanquack during The Great Pootatuck Duck Race on Saturday, June 13:

"When in the course of poultry events, it becomes necessary for one flock to paddle forth from tyranny, algae buildup, and insufficient breadcrumbs, a decent respect for the opinions of ducks requires that they declare the causes which impel them to the splash.

We hold these truths to be self-evident:

*That all ducks are created adorable.

*That they are endowed by their Que-acker with certain unalienable rights.

*That among these are Life, Liberty, and the Pursuit of a Really Good Current.

To secure these rights, Duck Races are instituted among waterfowl, deriving their just powers from the consent of their manufacturers. Whenever any form of boredom becomes destructive to these ends, it is the Right of the Ducks to alter or abolish it, and to institute new festivities — laying their foundations on fun principles and organizing their powers in such form as shall seem most likely to produce joy, laughter, and charitable giving.

When a long train of dull Saturdays, predictable weekends, and insufficient community merriment reduces the spirit, it is the Ducks’ right — nay, their duty — to rise up, fluff their feathers, and demand a day of games, exhibitors, entertainment, and glorious aquatic competition upon the mighty Pootatuck.

Such has been the patient suffering of these Ducks; and such is now the necessity which compels them to declare their independence from the ordinary.

We, the little yellow rubber citizens of Newtown, are proud to have the support of the Newtown Lions. For their history is our history: of noble deeds, charitable works, and the occasional questionable fashion choice.

We, therefore, united in quack and purpose — do solemnly declare that all Ducks to be Free and Independent, from the tyranny of dry land and boring Saturdays, and endowed by Toy Makers with a Fair and Equal Opportunity to Float Triumphantly.

And for the support of this Ducklaration, with firm reliance on the generosity of our sponsors, volunteers, and the good people gathered here today, we mutually pledge to each other our Bills, our Feathers, and our Sacred Honor.

Let the Great Pootatuck Duck Race begin."