April Fools Day coincides with the return of Daylight Savings Time this year, which I predict will cause all kinds of problems. As always, we are warning people of the change on our front page this week, but way back in the distant mists of time, The Bee did get the time change wrong one year and fooled more than a few people into being early for appointments (or was it late?). So people don’t really know what the story is this week, right? You’ll just have to trust me: it’s no joke.

Gordon Williams says the beard he has grown of late is really an adolescent fantasy. “I never had enough hair when I was young to grow a beard,” he explained. “So now that I’m retired, I decided to grow one. I’ll probably keep it until after Lena and I see our daughters this spring, then I’ll shave it off.”

Gordon also wants to alert everyone that the ducks are coming, so be on the lookout for the Lions Club’s latest fundraiser for the Treadwell Park playground. There will be more information about this later – lots more, if Gordon has any say about it.

Congratulations to John and Tara Kortze, who are the proud parents of a healthy baby girl named Keeley. The little girl was born March 20 and entered the world weighing 6 pounds, 11 ounces and measuring 19 inches.

Legislative Council Chairman Pierre Rochman held true to form this week as he showed up at Tuesday’s public hearing on the town budget wearing a bow tie. At this year’s hearing, however, he also came sporting a new haircut.

Look what Darlene Spencer rooted out from a curtain drain at her house last week! It’s a root system, approximately five feet long, that had overtaken and blocked the drain. A 150-foot snake (a plumber’s snake, not a Python) inserted in the drainpipe by her husband, Andy, and her brother, Dale Walker, went only about 12 feet before hitting this obstruction. A backhoe had to be brought in to dig up the pipe and dislodge the roots, which had a sponge-like consistency. It looked like the world’s largest loofa, and it was the conversation piece of the week at the C.H. Booth Library, where Darlene works.

Best wishes go out to super realtor Bob Gleason, who was forced to take time off from his busy schedule to battle a case of strep throat.

Former Bee reporter Jeff White is down in Washington, D.C., these days cutting his teeth as an intern writer for the Waterbury Republican and Wall Street Journal. This week, Jeff’s byline appeared in the Wall Street Journal for the first time.

It was a birthday kind of a week at Canaan House this week as four of Newtown’s beloved town employees turned another year older. This week’s birthday people were Mark Cooper, Donna McCarthy, Steve Driver, and Nancy Kokoski.

Newtown resident Annie Lux, now a junior at Yale University, will spend this upcoming summer pedaling her way across the United States. She’ll leave from New Haven on June 2 and, sometime during her first day, will actually pass through Newtown before making her way westward.

Chamber of Commerce members were the guests of honor Tuesday afternoon at Kendro Products of Newtown. The company hosted an open house, provided tours, and served lots of tasty hors d’oeuvres. Several Chamber members said they came to the Pecks Lane facility to find out exactly what it is Kendro Products makes. The answer: centrifuges.

Cast members of the Newtown High School Drama Club’s spring musical Man of La Mancha were ecstatic Saturday night after the final performance of the show when they could shave their faces and cut their hair. Rumor has it at the cast party they had a beard shaving moment.

Sandy Hook residents may have found a balloon or two hanging in their trees from the celebration at the Children’s Adventure Center for their achievement of becoming nationally accredited. Over 60 balloons were released for the celebration.

Newtown High School Principal William Manfredonia had flashbacks last week as the musical began. It brought back memories of when he had played Don Quixote while in college. He joked with Grant Skinner, the lead for Man of La Mancha, that he could be his understudy and fill in if Grant got sick. I guess that makes Jules Triber Sancho Panza.

I’m off to joust at a few windmills now, but I’ll be back so be sure to…

Read me again.