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BRIDES (special section) Now Playing-- Even In Film, Weddings Always Mean Some

Kind Of Life Change

By Trey Paul Alexander III

Weddings mean different things to different people. For me, attendance at a

wedding usually turns out to be a joyful time, albeit with just a hint of the

bittersweet. It is joyful for the happiness of friends or family members who

have found their lifelong mate and companion; bittersweet for the tangible

sense of a turning of the page in one's life, a moment in which the phrase

"There's no turning back" is (or at least, should be) wholly true.

There are many perspectives on weddings and their effect upon individuals. The

variety of viewpoints is reflected in the number of films that chronicle all

things nuptial. Time and space limitations hinder me from giving a

comprehensive survey of such films, but a look at four different movies --

Father of the Bride (1950), Four Weddings and a Funeral, Muriel's Wedding and

My Best Friend's Wedding -- should give us a hint of the diversity of emotions

and feelings weddings can provoke.

Father of the Bride features a luminous Elizabeth Taylor as "daddy's little

girl." Taylor plays the daughter of Stanley Banks, played wonderfully by

Spencer Tracy. This movie takes the perspective of the flustered father, right

down to the voiceover narration. Stanley can't bear the thought of losing his

one and only daughter, but once he comes to terms with the inevitability of

her wedlock, he is then shocked by the price tag that accompanies marital

bliss (money can't buy me love but it sure pays for the trimmings).

Stanley gets so frustrated with all the planning and mounting bills that he

secretly and slyly "suggests" to his daughter that she and her beau elope.

Father of the Bride captures the range of sentiment all Dads go through, from

the questions of whether the future son-in-law is good enough for "my girl,"

to the dread of possible wedding mishaps, to the apprehension of saying

goodbye.

From a father's perspective we turn to the single adult's point of view, as

given to us in Four Weddings and a Funeral. As the title indicates, much of

the action occurs at five different occasions, each connected with the next.

The first wedding serves to introduce us to Charles (Hugh Grant) and his

eccentric coterie of pals (one of whom is played by the cool, refined Kristin

Scott Thomas of The English Patient.

Together, Charles and his friends serve as a sort of singles club elite --

always attending weddings but never taking center stage for the "I do's"...

but not of their own choosing, mind you. Through some witty dialogue and

sprinklings of poignancy, the picture rings true often enough as it depicts

the anxiety of Charles and his mates as they wonder if they'll ever find that

one true someone.

Such questions are at the crux of Muriel's Wedding (directed by P.J. Hogan), a

movie concerned with the fantasies of Muriel Heslop (Toni Collette), whose

dreams are epitomized by ABBA's classic single, "Dancing Queen." Muriel's sad

state is captured in the film's opening sequence, in which a wedding bouquet

lands in her outstretched hands, only to be taken away by the debutante squad,

which chides her for being selfish and forces her to forfeit it over to

someone more "worthy."

As the movie progresses, we come to root for Muriel although we acknowledge

her imperfections. Even when Muriel begins to develop a genuine friendship

with a spirited classmate, she still puts unmerited value in social status and

continues to dream of becoming the center of attention by being the ultimate

bride in a wedding to be envied. Although Muriel's motivations may not be

pure, her longing for the perfect fairy tale wedding is not so far-fetched

from the desires of many.

Finally, the more recent My Best Friend's Wedding, also directed by Hogan,

deals with the desperation that can be aroused when news arises of the

nuptials of one's dearest friend. In this case, the coming wedding spurs

Julianne (Julia Roberts) to scheme for the perfect moment in which she can

declare her love for ex-beau Michael (Dermot Mulroney), a love kept dormant

over the years but forced to the forefront by the urgency of his impending

marriage plans. Subterfuge is her plan, and if she can find a way to show him

the error of his ways, then he will be hers and all will be right with the

world.

My Best Friend's Wedding explores the feelings of being left behind that can

emerge during matrimony affairs, not to mention the denial that creeps in when

we realize our friends are moving to a new, significant stage in their lives

while we might rather have things stay the way they are.

Ultimately, no matter from whose perspective a wedding is gazed, what it often

boils down to is a palpable, undeniable sense of change. Whether it's a father

giving his daughter's hand in marriage, a single guy standing next to his

buddy as best man, or a bridesmaid daydreaming about her glorious moment in

the sun yet to come, there is always a true sense of the passage of time and

the advent of a new age in the lives of not just two people, but in the lives

of all the people they know and love.