Date: Fri 15-Mar-1996

Publication: Bee

Author: ANDREA

Quick Words:

Reporter's-Journal-Paulsen

Full Text:

No Fanfare. Just A Bowl Of Soup With Lee Paulsen.

B Y A NDREA Z IMMERMANN

When I ask people if there's one thing they want to do before they die, they

pause, wrinkle their brow, and say it's something they've never really thought

about. When pressed, they offer answers that stand like pickets in a fence -

straight, neat, and quite predictable. Raise a family... Open a photography

studio... Win an award... Go on a hot air balloon ride... Learn to play the

piano... Visit each of the world's seven continents.

I'm not surprised by their answers, but perhaps that's because I know these

people well; I am already privy to their heart's desires. They are achievers

and their goals relate a value of self and work and family.

The question has stuck in my mind, though, now for months because of a brief

phone conversation I had with Lee Paulsen. I don't really know Lee; I've only

talked with her two or three times as a source for stories I was writing. She

has lived in Newtown for 21 years, is active in the community, works full time

and commutes a distance - these few things I know.

But what stands out in my mind is what she shared with me last time we spoke,

and the intensity in which she said it. "I'm going to do it before I die. I'm

going to start a soup kitchen in Newtown," she said.

Why would anyone think that Newtown needed a soup kitchen? Does hunger really

exist in our town?

Take a look at some hard facts: In 1995, 211 Newtown residents received food

stamps, 130 families were awarded Aid To Families With Dependents, 38 elderly

and disabled residents received state supplement, and total of 535 people

qualified for medical benefits through the state (some of these are also

represented in the first numbers). The town also administered general

assistance to 60 different households last year; 25 more households received

the medical portion alone. And 100 people were helped through the energy

assistance program.

"There are so many people here we don't `see,'" said Lee, who, along with Jo

Morris, coordinates the FAITH food pantry at St John's Episcopal Church in

Sandy Hook. Last year, that pantry provided food to 110 different families

(totalling more than 600 people); the Salvation Army Food Pantry also helped

stock the refrigerators of residents in need.

Anne, a 20-year resident, was earning a good income. Then her daughter got

sick and subsequently died, leaving her with three young grandchildren to

raise. Now, she said, she is on the "flip side" of life needing to reach out

for help.

"I've used both pantries [in town] off and on for the last four years," she

said. "Thank God for them - without them my kids would go hungry."

But pride tends to hold people back from going to the pantry, said Anne. "I

ran into a lady I [was acquainted with] and she was so embarrassed she hid in

the bathroom in the pantry. I said, `Hey, I'm here for the same reason you

are; I'm trying to feed my kids, too."

Anne thinks having a soup kitchen in town is a great idea. "I'd be more than

happy to help get it off the ground. They've gone the extra mile to help me,

and I would do whatever I could to reciprocate," she said. "And I wouldn't be

ashamed to take my children to a soup kitchen, if there was one here. I

wouldn't go to Danbury, though."

There are those who benefit from lunches at the Senior Center, or lunch

brought by Meals on Wheels volunteers. But there are some who will not

participate or do not qualify for these programs, said Lee, and a soup kitchen

could fill that gap. "There are young mothers. Maybe there are people out of

work who would just like to come and have a cup of soup. And it doesn't have

to be that someone is really strapped," said Lee. "What would it cost? A pot

of soup doesn't cost anything. So what if nobody came this week - I'd go home

and freeze the soup."

Like most people who are deeply involved in community service, Lee knows there

is a hunger in Newtown other than that which can be stayed by food. But those

who suffer it are reticent to admit it - loneliness is not a dignified thing.

This may be the reason why no one showed last Thanksgiving when Lee and an

army of volunteers organized a big turkey dinner for residents who might

otherwise celebrate the day alone. But rather than give up on the idea of

reaching out to those in need, Lee has decided to take a smaller step.

"I think in the very beginning it would be a pot of soup and loaf of bread at

St John's Church on Tuesday when we're opened for the food pantry," she said.

"We could go a month with no one. Then one person might come in and then maybe

the next week we'd have two... I think there are people out there for this cup

of soup. It would be 'feeding' me, too."

Human Resource Director Sheila Knox said that a small-scale soup kitchen might

benefit residents who can't prepare a hot meal for themselves, those who live

alone, or people who exist on a limited income. "It's a good way to stretch

food dollars and have some social interaction," she said. "Especially for

single people [or senior citizens]... We're seeing more people here just

renting rooms, or people with efficiencies that just have a hot plate or

microwave."

After 13 years of working at the food pantry, Lee is still moved by those who

come in for food. "They are really frightened, and we hand them a piece of

paper to sign - one that says they are Newtown residents and [that they will

use the pantry only once a month] - and they start to cry. They are so

thankful that we're not asking other questions," she said. "But who are we to

judge? It could be us next week," said Lee, who has offered food out of her

own freezer when supply is low at the food pantry.

"I told Lee, if I win the lottery I'm going to buy her a halo," said Anne.

"She is a very caring person, and she lets you know she cares."

Right now, having a soup kitchen in Newtown is still a dream but it's one that

Lee hangs on to fervently. It's something she knows she could start and do

herself.

"I'd just say to people who came into the pantry, `Would you like a bowl of

soup?'" Lee explained. "No fanfare. I'd just sit down and chat with them, make

them feel at home. It's not that I'd be talking to them like I'm a

psychiatrist or anything. It's just that I'm me."

I'm not sure what one thing I would want to do before I die, because my view

of life is broadening and I'm starting to think about things differently. But

maybe you'd like come down to St John's Church, have a cup of soup, and share

some ideas with me and a woman who is "just Lee Paulsen."