Parents of children on opposing teams might be the only ones who understand where Marc Kenney, coach of the Newtown High School girls’ soccer team, is coming from. Kenney, maybe as competitive as a coach can be, says he preferred a tie each time his Nighthawks met Immaculate of Danbury throughout the last decade and a half.

That is because of the friendship he and Immaculate Coach Nelson Mingachos have.

“He was the first person who called me when I got the job,” said Kenney, referring to 15 years ago when he left his coaching role at Southern Connecticut State University to take over the Newtown program.

At the time, Mingachos was only a couple of years into his tenure as Immaculate’s head coach. Kenney and Mingachos had crossed paths at Central Connecticut State University — Kenney played soccer and Mingachos was a kicker on the football team — but their friendship really developed due to their South-West Conference coaching connection.

The Newtown and Immaculate girls’ soccer team leaders went on to coach premier soccer teams together and serve jointly on a variety of state, New England, and conference soccer committees. They even had the opportunity to coach each other’s high school players together during the offseason. Mingachos served as the SWC girls’ soccer contact/liaison for several years, and overlapped with Kenney, who took over the responsibility in recent years.

Mingachos announced in late October that he is retiring from coaching when his team’s state tournament run ends. Mingachos won ten state championships and four SWC titles, including a pair of victories over Kenney’s teams. Kenney has a Class LL state title under his belt and has won a pair of SWC championships and his teams have several finals appearances. Between the two coaches, there have been a lot of wins, but their competitive edges were softened a bit when it came to head-to-head matchups.

Kenney and Mingachos coached against each other one last time in the SWC tourney quarterfinals on October 29, a game Newtown won 1-0 in overtime (see related story).

Newtown’s coach said they were hoping not to have to meet in the conference playoffs but, prior to the game, Mingachos told Kenney if his team had to be eliminated he preferred it be by Kenney’s Nighthawks over any other team.

“We literally have joked every game that I would take a tie against him every day of the week. There’s that measure of respect,” Kenney said. “We root for each other. Every game he wasn’t playing me I rooted for him.”

Mingachos said their wives and family members used to joke and refer to their connection as a “bromance.”

The coaches helped each other both for All SWC team selections in their off-field SWC roles and in giving tips about opposing teams by discussing their games, usually from their respective cars on the way home, Kenney said.

“We talked after every game. This went on, without fail, for every game for 15 years,” Kenney said. “I’m going to miss that.”

“We were constantly on the phone before games, after games,” added Mingachos, who noted that he still intends to be in touch with Kenney following his Newtown games.

The quasi scouting reports were not necessary when the teams were set to match up against each other.

“By the time we played each other we knew so much about each other’s teams,” said Mingachos, adding that Newtown and Immaculate have each won about half the time in their matchups.

Kenney said that in today’s world it is rare to find two teams that meet so often with no issues and that the Nighthawks and Immaculate Mustangs regularly have had contests full of sportsmanship due to the coaching connection. Newtown’s coach said he does not even consider the Newtown-Immaculate connection a rivalry despite the high level of play and proximity of the schools due to the close connection he has with Mingachos.

“He is without question the most important person I’ve come across in coaching high school soccer,” Kenney said. “I’m really, really going to miss him.”

Sports Editor Andy Hutchison can be reached at andyh@thebee.com.