Volunteers Hope Small Squares Make A Big Difference To Cancer Survivors

By Shannon Hicks

When Newtown’s Annual Relay For Life celebration returns for 2010, one of the things that will be introduced may not even be noticed by those who participate in the main event. The new addition will be celebrated during the Survivors’ Reception on June 4, the day before the overnight relay at Fairfield Hills, when guests are presented with Survivor-Caregiver Squares.

The squares are similar to prayer shawls that are often made by members of churches and given to children upon baptism, or people going through illness. Such shawls are handmade and often created while people are sharing good thoughts and prayers, and given with the hope that the shawls will surround the recipients with similar feelings.

On a much smaller — and nonreligious — scale, Newtown Relay For Life will be giving a pair of small crocheted squares to the cancer survivors who attend this year’s Survivor Reception. The squares measure about three inches by three inches, and help is needed to make sure there are enough squares for all of the attendees.

“We think of these as pocket prayer shawls,” said Jen Ayles, a member of this year’s Survivorship Committee.

“…but without the religious connotation,” fellow committee member Alison Cole added.

The Survivorship Committee is responsible for hosting a special reception the day before the Relay itself. The committee is being chaired this year by Michelle Babyak; additional members include Serena Brumaghim, Debbie Eventoff, Samantha Kent, KC Mills, and Diana Paproski.

“We focus on a reception for the survivors because we don’t want to forget what Relay is all about: those who have survived and those who cared for them,” said Ms Cole. Involved now in her fourth Newtown Relay event (and her second with the Survivorship Committee), Ms Cole joined the Relay effort to honor the parents of her friend Kristen Angell, whose mother is a breast cancer survivor and whose father lost his battle to pancreatic cancer.

“Sometimes in the hustle and bustle of Relay that gets lost, and the point of the reception is to remind everyone why we are here,” Ms Cole continued.

The 2009 Survivors’ Reception had at least 150 attendees, and Ms Cole and Mrs Ayers expect at least that number again this year.

Invitations are sent to those who register for Relay and give organizers permission to contact them for just such an event. Doctors and hospitals are also contacted, as is Ann’s Place, Home of I Can, the Danbury-based organization devoted to serving cancer survivors and their families, to see if they have patients and clients who may be interested in attending.

“Any cancer survivor is welcome,” said Mrs Ayers. She and her husband Ken were Newtown’s 2009 Honorary Co-Chairmen. “You don’t have to be involved in Relay.”

“The basic concept of the squares is that you have a matching pair of items,” said Ms Cole. “When you are not near your caregiver or loved one, you should take comfort in knowing that they have the matching half.”

The idea for the caregiver-survivor squares came to Newtown through a friend of Mrs Ayles. Shortly after Ken Ayles was diagnosed with brain cancer in August 2008, a friend of Ken and Jen gave the couple a pair of crocheted circles along with a full-size prayer shawl.

“They’re cloth, so you can take them everywhere, including into an MRI, and that’s important,” Mrs Ayles said last week, pulling one of her circles out of her purse and playing with it. “They became like a security blanket to Ken. There was about a year when he wouldn’t leave the house without one.

“He still takes his into tests and I’ll hang onto mine in the waiting room, so it’s like we’re still connected,” she added.

While the crocheted items from Oxford were created in circles, Newtown has adapted theirs to be square. The squares themselves will all be done in purple — the color of Relay for Life — while additional symbols (flowers, a Relay logo, etc) and colors may be added onto some of the squares.

When completed, each square will have a note attached to it with a description of the square’s purpose along with a quotation by Norman B. Rice: “Dare to reach out your hand into the darkness, to pull another hand into the light.”

“Our goal is the be able to give a pair to each survivor on June 4,” said Ms Cole. That means there needs to be at least 300 squares finished by then.

“It’s a big task,” Ms Ayles added.

Currently a few Survivorship Committee members, including Mrs Ayles and Ms Cole, and a few friends are working on the square pairs. But a lot of help is needed if the committee is going to be able to create enough pairs in time for the early June event.

Newtown and area residents are invited to help. Again, they do not need to be involved with other Relay events in order to offer their time and talent to this. On the other hand, this offers people a chance to do something for Relay without being involved in the public events if that is their wish.

“We are looking for people who want to learn, or already know how to crochet, to help us,” Ms Cole said.

Members of the Survivorship Committee will host a lesson on Thursday, April 15, prior to the next Relay committee meeting. Anyone interested in learning how to make the squares is invited. Bring a skein of purple yarn and a crochet hook, and be prepared to be crocheting by the end of the hour.

The lesson will be in the cafeteria at Newtown Middle School, 11 Queen Street, beginning at 6 pm. All ages are welcome.

“It’s really a nice little comfort thing,” said Mrs Ayles. “Ken and I have ours with us always.”

To find out more about the Survivor-Caregiver Squares or to become part of the team making the squares, contact Michelle Babyak at 203-270-6265.