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‘I Am So Tired’



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To the Editor:

I am so tired. I say this more times a day than is healthy. I am so freaking tired.

I feel it every time I take a glance at the news, or have the misfortune of reading a Facebook comment, or just think too hard about everything that has happened in such a short period of time.

We say “everything that has happened” in 2020 because it is so hard to comprehend the volume of destruction that has happened in the 240 days since this year started.

Donald Trump was impeached. Harvey Weinstein was sentenced. We assassinated Qasem Soleimani and almost went to war with Iran. The western half of our country is burning. We’re facing simultaneous devastating hurricanes on our southern coast. 170,000 Americans died of a disease — a number that could have been much smaller if our government had responded appropriately in the first place. And, despite the risk, we put on our masks and took to the streets to protest after police officers knelt on the neck of George Floyd for eight minutes and 46 seconds until he died.

We were called rioters, thugs, and un-American because we decided that we could not be silent anymore. We looked back at every protest, every effort we’ve made, every plea since Trayvon Martin was murdered in 2012, and felt defeated. Our friends and neighbors are being killed in the street by the people meant to protect them. The US government is tear-gassing demonstrators and unleashing the military on its own citizens.

It is too much. We have tried and fought so hard, and yet…

I am tired of fighting, screaming, doing everything I can to make sure the voices that need to be heard are heard, because I have privilege and it is my obligation to use that privilege to help those who do not. I am tired of the anxiety and the despair I feel whenever I look out at the rest of the world.

But I don’t get to be tired. I have to keep going. If I stop, if any of us stop, what will happen? What will change? I think we all know that the answer is nothing.

We don’t get to be tired until the work is done.

Tori Sandifer

3 Juniper Road, Newtown August 28, 2020

Comments are open. Be civil.
1 comment
  1. ryan knapp says:

    Qasem Soleimani was a terrorist killed in Iraq, a country he was in against UN orders, to destabilize a rebuilding nation and impose Shia dominance over Sunni and Christian minorities by causing chaos, terror and leading militia attacks. Iran has been a growing problem in the Middle East as it’s failing authoritarian regime, propped up Russia, who buys their oil, and China, through the Belt and Road Initiative. This is not simply an American concern, but a concern for all area states seeking peace, and was a major driver behind the historic peace agreement between Israel and the UAE, with more likely to come as a hedge against Iran.

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